That dream for me was becoming a Jewish spiritual leader but it was a dream all wrapped up nice and cozy in doubt. Who did I think I was and what did I know? How could I possibly afford to go school and what about my husband and my child and my house and my dog? And, and, and...
It was a big, scary dream which took me about 5 years of procrastinating and planning and strategizing to put into motion. I would like to tell you that once I actually began the journey that everything became clear and the fear decreased. But the truth is actualizing big dreams takes patience and perseverance and faith. You have to be willing to sit in the fear as you travel the road that dreams are made of. As my teacher Rabbi Mel Gottlieb asked me, "How much anxiety are you willing to sit with?"
It turns out that by engaging in the process one day and one semester at a time, I was actually able to sit with quite a lot, all the while moving towards making my dream a reality.
This is the perfect time of year to begin the journey. Spiritual preparation for Rosh Hashanah and Yom Kippur involves looking inward in order to assess our life in the year past. We ask whether we lived harmoniously with other people and the planet. Did we meet our spiritual and personal obligations? Is there someone I need to ask forgiveness of or someone I need to forgive?The final step in this process is charting the road ahead in the year to come. So take a deep breath and make this the year of your big dream.